Based on the book, On the Origin of Species by Means of Natural Erection, or The Perpetuation of Favoured Asses in a Spatial-Temporal Continuum, the early hominids were stubby, hairy, cave-dwelling creatures that strongly resembled apes or Joe Pesci. Humans lived in caves and possessed opposable thumbs. After living in the caves for over a million years, they tripped upon the most influential invention that sprung them past all other animals; namely, computers.
While humans were sending emails, instant messaging and buying their lingerie online, apes were merely shrugging their shoulders and eating bananas. Rigged is a product of computers, by which, I mean, he is a hand-iwork.
Rigged currently resides in Pukapuka with his wife, their baby humanoid named Bajaya and Dogo Argentino named Copernicus. It is believed Pukapuka literally means “beautiful Pukas”. Rigged spends a large part of his life traveling perilously in an effort to find food for his family. Perilous because, he has to fight a neurotic Stenonychosaurus and a genetically modified extra-smart Chasmosaurus to find his way to the nearest McDonald’s.
There is little or no information on what he does for a living but he plans to sell his share of the website as soon as we become famous! He has also been instrumental for initiating and establishing Sex, What The Fuck Is It? (SWTFIT) Currently, he is the Marchioness, Viscount and Earl of the foundation. Rigged also loves old cars, old wine, older women (preferably over the age of 30) but not necessarily in the same order of preference.
When he is not fighting Four-Legged Maniacs, Psychotic Pussies, Purple Fruit Snakes and Sharktopuses, meek-mannered Rigged spends his time riding his horse named Dapple and excogitating Cricket statistics!
u like older women???..i shall let my mum know..and do Stenonychosaurus and the other one actually exist…or existed…can u really ride a horse???.. oh and by the way im considering taking u to court for making me gain a whole pound in weight….cause i don’t do anything but sit here and just read ur website or then talk to u after which time i just go out and spend all my dad’s money on TP books and just read them like a maniac. It doesn’t help that everyone hears the sound of typing and thinks ‘my God our lil girl is a real hard worker she’s been typing away at that dissertation for the last 18 hours we’ll just not disturb her and take her up some high in fat german waffles with whipped cream and cinnamon’ which of course i havn’t. Since meeting u i’ve done a grand total of 500 words.. Oh and to top it off i now know every good site that sells seriously fetishly sexy leather knee high boots………… i’d say a corruption charge could stand up in court with a good lawyer whose mind works in similar ways to vimes’s. I would sue u for all your TP books and ur dog. =^..^= …dogs don’t have whiskers ?.. my male cat whose up the duff could beat him up…..
ps up the duff = pregnant out of wedlock…which most teenagers in wales are. particularly if u live in barry (barry= a small seaside town in south wales)
right i’m off. …ermm i may not see u tomorrow…because im being taken out to dinner….although i really don’t think the guy has ever looked at TP books yet alone read them so i can’t imagine the conversation will be very exciting…and worst of all he’s a rugby player (rugby player = fit but really thick) Anyhow ur not interested i should imagine at least in any of this soooo i will leave u in peace and bugger off
March 24th, 2007 | #
I dunno how to reach ya so i thot i leave u a comment.
How about a blog on teh polics of sport or the politicianswhodunnoafuckingthingaboutsport.
You could lead off with teh silence of The OZ pm who called murali a chucker and is awfully quiet with the Thorpedo and his drug antics
April 3rd, 2007 | #
may be we all should find another place to chat
June 14th, 2008 | #